Two Sisters, Two Stories: WAITING GAME.......IVF #7

SO….I just couldn’t help myself and had to use an egg/sperm image! I could hardly choose just one!!!(tried to pick one that wouldn't flip people out on their news feed!LOL!!!!) Have you ever seen sperm under a microscope? Really the cutest thing you’ve ever seen. (maybe not the cutest, but it is up there). YOu'll find yourself talking to them, telling them where to go, and rooting them on!!! HAHAHA!!! (Maybe only medical people do this. what weirdos!

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We are four days into the “waiting game”. Anyone who has done IVF knows this little “game” all too well!!! I have actually gotten a little used to it. I still think about it everyday. I still pray everyday for those little babies, but I can’t control it. God does. He already knows the outcome and fretting only robs today of it’s joy and precious moments. I know you might think….”easy for you to say now that you have babies". BUT….I can honestly say, I didn’t learn that after having my babies. I learned it and CHOSE it before I had them. I was consumed and not living, trying to control something that I couldn’t. Let me tell you, If you aren’t content with exactly what God has give you at any given moment, you won’t be content with more. I still struggle with this in other areas. There will always be something else. I am genuinely content with the boys I have because I became grateful for what God had given me before I had them. NOT that it was easy, or without pain and lots of tears. Otherwise, it wasn’t living and one day I would regret that too. I would regret all that I had let pass by. I can tell you what fretting and worrying definitely DO NOT do….change the outcome. So thankful I learned that. It's freeing!!! It is true peace and comes from Christ! No matter what you are going through, you can find contentment with gratitude. It is AMAZINg how it changes your heart. (warning…..not an easy filter to be put through….BUT oh so worth it!!!!) I read a book called, “Choosing Gratitude”! WOW!!!! Realized how ungrateful I was in general!!

Out of 11 eggs. 10 were useable and out of the 10, 5 fertilized. I would take ALL five, but odds are that 1 good one comes from the 5. Just like when you try to get pregnant and it takes you a few months. Same thing, some may have fertilized, but never made it past day 1, 2 or 5 so you try again the next month none the wiser. This happens every month and to every women(well most)!

Anyone who goes through this knows that you could get that call on day 5(6 since retrieval) that no embryos made it, but why dwell on that! If we get ONE good embryo, we will be SO thankful. TWO and we will be ECSTATIC. THREE and I will be COMPLETELY shocked!!! Odds are 1-2 good ones.

A little perspective: In my first IVF cycle when I was 32 years old, we retrieved 13 eggs and 9 fertilized and we ended up with 5 GREAT embryos and TWO perfect boys!!! The other three didn't take. Egg quality diminishes as you age. Now, at 37/38, I have been averaging 1 really good embryo. That is how much fertility changes from 32 to 38!!!! Thank you modern medicine!!! And Dr. McKinney!!!!! You're the BEST!!!! This lady even shed tears with me after the retrieval!!!! A rare find in a doctor!!!

IVF #5: 13 eggs, 3 embryos, but only 1 really good, 1 average, and 1 not so good at all. We put him in anyway!
IVF #6: 7 eggs, 1 really good embryo frozen. YAY!!! (one better than none)
IVF #7: Current cycle: 11 eggs, 5 fertilized....waiting on embryo status.

If you know someone going through IVF for the first time, you can know that they have been through months and years of other fertility treatments, surgeries, IUI, tests, lab sticks, clomid, more lab sticks, shots, meds, and worst years of there infertility. We had multiple appointments, two surgeries, many tests, IUI's, and clomid to name a few!!! I think people here someone is starting IVF and we think that it is the beginning…..when someone tells me they are starting IVF……my heart breaks because I know the pain they have endured to get to that point.